CYOA Life of Crime

Wander Around Committing Random Acts Of Senseless Violence

You figure you’ve reached a point in your life where it’s alright to
indulge in a little violence. You look out over the crowd of police officers and bystanders and squint at them while holding your fingers near your eye and pretending to crush their heads, causing each of their heads to explode messily. You hop into one of the undamaged squadcars and squeal out onto the road, whistling a happy tune.

You park the car in front of a fancy restaurant downtown and then amuse yourself by simply wandering down the crowded streets, disinterestedly gesturing at passersby to cause them grievous harm. Various creative methods of execution are used, but these are fairly graphic and need not be detailed here. Let it just be known that you do a efficient job of ensuring that every living soul in the city is destroyed in some terrible fashion.

After you’ve finished, you sit in a lawn chair out in front of a family owned deli. You begin to stroke your chin thoughtfully as a gentle wind begins to blow down the empty road. After a while you lean forward a bit and clear your throat. “I wonder what would happen if everyone who ever lived in this city came back as ghosts all at once. That would be pretty weird huh?” An empty drink cup responds by being blown down the sidewalk. “I wonder why you never see any Asian ghosts,” you add, picking at a tattered piece of plastic on the chair, “I think I’d like to see an Asian ghost. Or at least a non white ghost anyway.” Somewhere in the distance a piece of rubble falls from its perch clattering three stories to the pavement below, the sound echoing through deserted streets. You sit quietly for a few more minutes and then stand up, brushing imagined dirt from the front of your pants. “Welp, suppose I’d better be going. Earth’s not going to depopulate itself.” You begin walking down the road, heading noplace in particular.


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