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Worthless Guide to Housing: Apartments

It’s difficult to describe what makes a place feel like “home”. Is it the fetid air that wafts in when you open a window? The charming view of the local gang corner? Or perhaps it’s the way milky water bubbles back up from the drain each time you use the sink because of that mysterious […]

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Eyepod Plus Plus

Let me just preface this by saying that I hereby refuse to use the proper “brand” spelling or capitalization when writing i-POd. I’m deliberately going to punctuate it differently every time I use it too, just to spite the OCD advertising executives over at a**le (Yeah, real big victory right? Maybe six people will see […]

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Random Object Reviews: Part Two

From time to time I find certain items lying around the house. That’s it. I just find different things sometimes; I have nothing else to say. But hmm… I guess I’ll need more than that to fill an entire article huh?

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Snapple Facts: Madness

Now here are some more snapple facts. These particular items come courtesy of the patients at Bethlem Royal Hospital’s mental ward. They’ve worked very hard to bring you these, so I hope you have a grand old time! Thanks and be sure to have your pets spayed and neutered.

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Worthless Guide to Security Guards

Many hurtful things have been said about security guards over the years: They’re nothing but uneducated whiteboys on a power trip! They’re lazy bigots who couldn’t cut it as cops! All they do is sit at a desk all day popping pills and fondling themselves gently while frowning at a dog-eared and slightly moist copy […]

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Snapple Facts: Kids

Did you know that Snapple now has a line of fruit drinks for children? Instead of having “fun facts” under the caps, they feature a number of child safety tips. Here are some suggestions I have for extra tips that might help a kid out. Once again, Snapple had better not try to steal these […]