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How To Not Know How To Fix Cars

There are many types of men. There are ingenious men, effeminate men, chessplaying men, steel-driving men, and men who play electric guitars. Some men wear derby hats and play pingpong, and others comb their filthy sideburns while whistling tunelessly. It’s a hell of a thing. I think my point is that it would be pointless […]

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Unforgivable Game Design Sins

As someone who most people would consider to be pretty annoying, I’m in a good position to know what’s bothersome and what isn’t. So I’ve decided to go through a few little things in videogames which annoy me. This is stuff that developers should easily be able to fix, but they’re either too stupid, or […]

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Pop Culture Icons I Am Unfamiliar With: The Flying Nun

So yeah, I definitely don’t have any idea what The Flying Nun is. The words “The Flying Nun” reside somewhere deep in my psyche, and when I hear someone speak them (in that order) I feel a small surge of recognition (as in: Oh, that’s a thing which I am aware of the existence of) […]

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Worthless Guide to Monsters: Jersey Devil

Most people reading this aren’t going to have a clue what the Jersey Devil is. But that’s why you’re here, isn’t it? You’re here to learn. At least I hope you are. Because if you aren’t, this eighteen cent grant the federal government gave me to research on the Jersey Devil is just going to […]

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Mother’s Day: A History in Picture

The following is a mother’s day card I have created. Feel free to print it and arrange it on construction paper as you see fit. Mother’s will love to receive this card as a gift (and it’s free). Just sign your name at the end. You’ll be golden.

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Animal Awards: Worms

Facts about worms: 1. Worms have two hearts; yet they refuse to experience love. 2. Worms do not have eyes; their lives are filled with unseen terrors. 3. Worms have teeth; if provoked, it is possible for a worm to bite a human. 4. Worms begin to drown in soil when it rains; they squirm […]

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Black People Are Good Folks

By Tommy Perkins I dont think my granpa Carvello likes black people much. Every time were in the car and a black guy even comes close he presses the button so the door locks real quick. one time I asked: hey granpa why did you do that anyhow and he says: You know you got […]

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Walker: Texas Ranger – Spec Script

FADE-IN   CONSTRUCTION SITE – WIDE SHOT – DAY Walker’s truck is shown entering GLEN COVE CONSTRUCTION site. Three CONSTRUCTION TOUGHS mill around out front, kicking at dirt and leaning against various objects. WALKER exits his DUSTY AMERICAN TRUCK and approaches them. WALKER: I’m a Texas Ranger, do any of you boys know where I […]