In this issue of Sainted / Tainted we’ve only printed letters from war
veterans. Theirs are a voice which is often lost in the hustle and
bustle of everyday life. Please take some time out of your day to visit
a war veteran or something. Nah, I changed my mine. It doesn’t really
matter.

Tainted

The Village Video store in Blue Lake Park. Me and my cousin Saul went there last Sunday to try and rent Transformers
the movie. We couldn’t find it on the shelf, so we asked one of your
employees if it was available. His response was “Hmm no, it’s actually
out of stock right now, but if you’re such a big fan of s**t movies,
here’s one you’ll probably like.” He then tossed the empty box for The
Wicker Man at us and walked away laughing. What ever happened to good
old fashioned customer service?

Angry In Tuscon

Tainted

The
person (or persons) who stole the American flag from the pole in my
front yard. I was planning to publicly burn that flag in a
demonstration I had planned against females in politics, but now what
am I supposed to do? I guess can probably just burn the Texas flag since
it looks sort of similar, but I think people are probably going to
notice. Man, you people really tighten my jaws sometimes.

Tory Bomen

Sainted

The
guy who sold me the pills I just took. Or the screaming infant child
which rode out of my living room ceiling on top of a bleeding woolly
mammoth. The mammoth roared menacingly as it bore down upon me, and I
remember shouting something about rats streaming from a rotted lung and
starting to sink down and down and down into the couch and into the
floor and into the earth. My mouth felt as if it were filled with soil.
Then there was this terrible sound – a scream – and someone on the
television was saying something about “Here comes the falls” and my own
mother appeared before me from the mouth of the mammoth and looking
into her eyes I saw only my own sick self. Fiends! They’ll not escape
my grasp again; I’ll kill everything I touch! Everything…

The Colors… The Colors…

Tainted

The
rude ambulance driver who came to assist us after my father had
collapsed in the street. You just barged right in to a conversation me
and my brother were having without even so much as an “excuse me” and
started ordering people around! You were shouting: “Do this, do that,
prop his head up, is he on any medications, blah blah blah.” Is it
really so hard to say please? You’re just lucky my brother piped up and
told you dad was a diabetic, because I sure as hell wasn’t going to do
your job for you. Frankly I enjoyed watching you sweat it out. “Oooh
he’s in shock, he’s had a seizure, it could be heart trouble!” You
should’ve seen your face! Next time maybe you’ll show a little more
respect when people are talking.

A Concerned Son

Sainted

The
irresponsible 20-something mother who left her infant son in the car
unattended while she went into the gas station to get cigarettes and
candy. I thought God was cruel and vicious when I learned he had made
me barren, but when I saw that little boy alone in that running car, I
knew that He had opened a window for me. I’ve named the child Hunter.
He is a very good and handsome little boy. He’s my little boy. I’ve
gone far away and I will raise him and he will never know. He will
never know. Well, I have to go now, I can hear him crying. Hope you
enjoyed your skittles.

Marion Redman

Tainted

Me.
I want to apologize to the driver I cut off on Highway 36 going north
at about 10:40 on Tuesday. One of the girls I had in the passenger seat
had tried to snort amphetamine off the other one’s naked back with the
window open and the stuff went spraying all over the car. Some got into
my eyes and I swerved. I apologize if I caused you any grief.

Ryan Mosswheather

Have something you need to get off your chest? Try punching a pillow or
small animal. If that doesn’t work, you can send your letters to:
“Sainted Tainted PO box 442 Maskfaceton PR 52212”