REVIEWS

The Baron's Film Korner: Iron Man

Iron ManBy Martin “The Baron” Hubley
“Holla, me gusto La Baron, pero yo quiero los videojuegos!” For those of you who don’t speak Spanish, what I just said was “Hello, my name is The Baron and I love movies!” It’s a fun little exersize in ethnic languages, and it doesn't hurt that it's true too. Me and my big & beautiful girlfriend Tina live for films. Who ever said large girls don't know how to have fun? Certainly not me.

Today I’m going to be reviewing two very different (but very similar) superhero films. The first is The Iron Man starring Robert Downing Junior, and the second is the George Clooney vehicle Michael Clayton.

The Baron's Film Korner: Hulks

HulkmaniaBy Martin “The Baron” Hubley
Greetings viewers, it’s your old pal The Baron here again with another great article! I apologize for not writing sooner, but my social life tends to get in the way. I’ve had to attend to the needs of my large and lovely girlfriend Tina lately, as she’s been down in the dumps ever since our dog Frenchie became pinned under the sink (don’t ask).  

Dead pugs aside; my life has been pretty sweet and sassy lately, partially due to the large number of superhero movies which have recently graced our theaters. So this  will cover the two Hulk films (the new one, and the old classic). I plan on making this a series so consider yourselves lucky.

Review: Things I Have Punched

Punched

I think I have a real rage problem. When I get frustrated I tend to punch or throw products and equipment. Maybe deep down I really have a problem with my own consumerism or something, who knows.

Eyepod Plus Plus

Eyepod

Let me just preface this by saying that I hereby refuse to use the proper “brand” spelling or capitalization when writing i-POd. I’m deliberately going to punctuate it differently every time I use it too, just to spite the OCD advertising executives over at a**le (Yeah, real big victory right? Maybe six people will see this).

Random Object Reviews: Part Two

Random Stuff

From time to time I find certain items lying around the house. That’s it. I just find different things sometimes; I have nothing else to say. But hmm… I guess I’ll need more than that to fill an entire article huh?

Awful Scifi Tech: The 6th Day & Total Recall (Creepy Android Edition)

6th Day
By Kevin
Funnyman Arnold Schwarzenegger has starred in two reasonably popular science fiction films, The 6th Day and Total Recall. Aside from taking place in the future and being goofy to the point of near insanity, these films also share another common trait: They both contain supercreepy androids. In The 6th Day it’s SimPal Cindy, a gape-mouthed animatronic mannequin child with beady eyes. In Total Recall it’s JohnnyCab, who looks a bit like an evil ventriloquist dummy version of Don Knotts dressed like a 1920s bus driver. Be warned that this article contains a number of frightening pictures and videos of these creatures, so it should probably not be viewed by small children or pets.

Awful Sci-fi Tech: Dune

Dune Fatman

Many science fiction films portray the future as a beautiful place where sleek chrome ships glide through skies, cybernetic servants cater to our every whim, and war is but a distant memory. In Dune however, the future is apparently the 70s. Drab, puffy-haired men wander around cheap sets in a druggy haze while mumbling vaguely religious threats, everyone wears unflattering jumpsuits, and seemingly, only three colors of paint exist: brown, green, and burnt orange. But most importantly, Dune takes place in a future where humans have seemingly disregarded all previous technological advancements in favor of a bunch of crappy stuff they found in junkyard somewhere.

Halo 3 Review

Halo
By Tommy
I wrote a email to this website about how much I like halo 3. The nice man who run this website asked if I could write a thing for this website about what I thought of it because I had an interesting per-spec-tive (had to look that up) about it. He says he will put it up and put pictures for it too. I said that sounds like a fun plan but I don’t write so good. He said it’s alright tommy just do your best.

Tech Magazines

Magazine
By M. Anger
I hate writing introductory paragraphs, so I'll just say that here are some reviews of some popular Magazines, Computer Shopper, Wired, Maximum PC, and Blender. Hope you enjoy complaints!


Computer Shopper

Bizarre Video Card Box Roundup

Vidcard
By M. Anger
If you’ve ever purchased a video card there’s a good chance you’ve noticed something about the boxes they come in: They are really, really stupid. Sure, there are a few vendors who go out of their way to try to use a nice-looking (or at least somewhat respectable) image for the front of their box, but the majority of these packages look more like they contain a cheap Korean squirt gun from the dollar store than a 300 dollar computer part. You don’t have to look very hard to find reviews for the cards themselves, but I haven’t seen anybody review the boxes themselves before. I have the feeling this is because people think it would be a complete waste of time, both for the reader and the author. Sounds great to me!
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