CYNICAL TOURIST'S GUIDES

The Cynical Tourist's Guide To...Idaho

The Tourist's Guide to Idaho
Believe it or not, sometimes people actually go to Idaho on purpose. Yeah, I know, it sort of blew my mind at first too, but it's true. "And what," you might ask, "do these people do once they've arrived in Idaho?" Hell if I know. According to the board of tourism's website Idaho is an "Outdoors-Oriented Community". So maybe they go on walks?

Or, maybe "outdoors community" is really just code for "There is nothing to do here. Now take some mushrooms and get lost on a hiking trail which will become oppressively sinister as darkness encroaches while indistinct voices cackle with laughter amongst the undergrowth and then you finally get home and can't even get to sleep because THE FOLDING CHAIR JUST WON'T SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT HEALTH CARE REFORM AARRGHH" which, appealing as it may sound, is probably not convincing too many families to take a road trip to Idaho.
 
But I suppose that is why I'm here: To convince you all that taking a trip to Idaho is the best choice a hesitant vacationer could make. So let's take a look at some of the attractions this fine state has to offer, won't us?

The Cynical Tourist's Guide To...North Dakota

Tourists Guide to North Dakota 
When I was a kid I would often refer to North Dakota as "The Boring Dakota". Now that I am older (and slightly wiser) I see how wrong I really was. North Dakota couldn't possibly be the boring Dakota because both Dakotas are the boring Dakota. I feel like South Dakota is only given a pass because it has a couple of reasonably worthwhile tourist attractions. This stands in stark contrast to the zero worthwhile attractions located in North Dakota. That is, unless you consider the LaMoure Toy Farmer Museum to be a worthwhile attraction. Personally I do not.
 
Nevertheless: I am now going to attempt to sell you on a vacation to North Dakota. This is the first in a 50-Part series in which I will describe and pointlessly insult the major tourist attractions in each state. If this sounds incredibly stupid to you, don't worry. I'll probably only be able to do three or four states before I get bored and abandon this idea forever.
 
But for now, let's check out some of the fantastic reasons to visit North Dakota!
Syndicate content


What Next?

Contact Bottom
Subscribe Bottom
What Is RSS Bottom

Affiliates